Stress Management: Auto Suggestion

(Refer for the most authentic articles on Building Leadership and Management: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.com

(Refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia “Management Universe” at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/)

Alternate Methods/Techniques of Stress Management

Many people use many alternative techniques to cope up with their stresses and strains.

We are including some of these alternative techniques in our various blog posts, one technique in one post. Though certain methodologies have been suggested for these techniques, you need not have to copy them ditto in any ritualistic way. You can introduce some suitable adjustments in them in order to help them suit your requirements for your own comfort.

The nomenclatures may vary. Yet, some often-used labels have been assigned to these techniques.

In this post we are describing one of such alternate techniques of stress management called “Auto Suggestion”.

Auto Suggestion: An Alternate Technique/Method of Stress Management

You can do it sitting as well as lying down.

1. Fix your gaze upon one spot on the ceiling (if you are lying down) or on the opposite wall (if you are sitting in a chair). This spot should be slightly above eye level towards the top of your head, a position that naturally produces tension in the eye muscles, and makes them feel heavy, so that they eventually begin to close.
2. Repeat each of the following statements several times in your mind:
   - My eyelids are becoming heavier.
   - They are heavy and tired and I cannot keep them open.
   - I am allowing my eyes to close.
3. Now breathe slowly and deeply. Repeat mentally: “each time I breathe out, I am becoming more relaxed”.
4. Allow yourself to feel relaxed.
5. Pass your attention over each muscle group in turn. As your attention moves over each muscle group, repeat mentally: “my hands are becoming relaxed”.
6. Do this in turn for your hands, arms, shoulders, neck, face, head, chest, stomach, back, legs and feet. After you have made each suggestion, move on to the next area of your body. Then, mentally repeat: “each time I breathe out, the feeling of relaxation increases”.
7. Do not check to see whether it is happening or not. It will distract you from this exercise. Just accept
   that you want it to happen, it will happen and it is already happening.
8. When you are comfortably relaxed, take four to five deep breaths. On each cycle of inhalation and exhalation (except for the last cycle) mentally repeat the words “this tension is all….” as you breathe in and “….going away” as you breathe out. On the last cycle, mentally say “this tension has all…..” as you breathe in and “….gone away completely” as you breathe out.
9. Now relax and do not move or open your eyes for a few minutes (could be 5 to 8 minutes or more as you wish). You are now lying or sitting eyes closed without any movement.
10. To come out from this state, say in your mind “I now wish to return to full awareness. I shall count from one to ten, and as I do so, I shall gradually come back to full awareness”. Then count up from one to ten, gradually open your eyes, suggesting to yourself that you are feeling good in every way, feeling better than ever before.
11. Get up slowly and start your other activities.

(You may like to download authors' eBook titled "Stress? No way!! (Handbook on Stress Management" at http://nbuu.co/4)

For More Guidance, Assistance, Training and Consultation

Contact: prodcons@prodcons.com


Training in all the soft skills and various management functions/techniques is imparted by Prodcons Group’s Mr Shyam Bhatawdekar and/or Dr (Mrs) Kalpana Bhatawdekar, eminent management educationists, management consultants and trainers- par excellence, with distinction of having trained over 150,000 people from around 250 organizations.


Also refer: (Prodcons Group) http://prodcons-group.blogspot.com/, (Training Programs by Prodcons Group) http://training-development-function.blogspot.com/, (Productivity Consultants) http://productivity-consultants.blogspot.com/

Other Topics of Interest: Counseling: General and Psychological

(Anger Management) http://controlling-anger.blogspot.com/
(Children’s Behavior Problems) http://child-behavior-problems.blogspot.com/
(Cholesterol Control) http://controlling-cholesterol.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counselingfamily.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counseling-family.blogspot.com/
(Cross Cultural Etiquette) http://cross-cultural-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Do This Today) http://do-this-today.blogspot.com/
(Emotions) http://emotion-feeling.blogspot.com/
(Executive Etiquette and Manners) http://executive-manners.blogspot.com/
(Exercises) http://exercises-plan.blogspot.com/
(Family Counseling) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/
(Health: Homeopathy) http://homeopathy-medicines.blogspot.com/
(Life Management: Competencies) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/competency-matrix/6txz9nck6g3/4#
(Life Management: Effectiveness Management: HSoftware) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/management-in-life-profession-family/6txz9nck6g3/3#
(Life management: I Am Liberated) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/i-am-liberated/6txz9nck6g3/6#view
(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/
(Ownership on Job) http://job-ownership.blogspot.com/
(Parental Responsibilities) http://parental-responsibilities.blogspot.com/
(Personality) http://human-personality.blogspot.com/
(Qualities of Spouse) http://spouse-qualities.blogspot.com/
(Quit Smoking) http://quit-smoking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Self Development) http://managing-self.blogspot.com/
(Self-confidence) http://self-confidence-improvement.blogspot.com/
(Spiritual Quotient/Intelligence) http://spiritual-quotient.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://managing-stress-strain.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://management-of-stress.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://success-achievement.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/success-in-life/6txz9nck6g3/14#view
(Swine Flu and Its Prevention) http://swine-flu-precaution.blogspot.com/
(Telephone Etiquette) http://telephone-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Walking) http://walking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Winners and Losers) http://winners-losers.blogspot.com/

Stress Management: Forgive and Forget

(Refer for the most authentic articles on Building Leadership and Management: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.com

(Refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia “Management Universe” at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/)

Alternate Methods/Techniques of Stress Management

Many people use many alternative techniques to cope up with their stresses and strains.

We are including some of these alternative techniques in our various blog posts, one technique in one post. Though certain methodologies have been suggested for these techniques, you need not have to copy them ditto in any ritualistic way. You can introduce some suitable adjustments in them in order to help them suit your requirements for your own comfort.

The nomenclatures may vary. Yet, some often-used labels have been assigned to these techniques.

In this post we are describing one of such alternate techniques of stress management called “Forgive and Forget”.

Forgive and Forget: An Alternate Technique/Method of Stress Management

It is not always easy, but the benefits of forgiving and forgetting can be powerful for emotional health and peace of mind.

Ideally both forgiving and forgetting should be done simultaneously for the best effect.

Some people say that they can forgive but cannot forget the wrong done to them. This will not give them complete peace of mind because they will keep remembering the painful past and it will keep troubling them and no one else. So why not forget too?

If you find difficulty in forgetting fully and the painful events come back to your mind now and then, it will be best to allow them but remember them graciously without letting them hurt you. Try to stop or filter out the bitterness the painful remembrance brings along with it. And stop or diminish your tendency of self-pity and hostility.

At times you may not be yet ready to forgive fully. In this case you can resort to decisional forgiveness. Decisional forgiveness involves choosing to let go of angry thoughts
about the person you feel has wronged you or you may decide to cut off your relationship with this person. Yet, the ultimate action will be the emotional forgiveness in which you replace the negative emotions such as resentment, bitterness, hostility, hatred, anger, and fear with love, compassion, sympathy and empathy.

You can use visualization method or cognitive method to forgive and forget.

In visualization method you can recall the painful incident and the related subjects in your imagination. Then suggest to yourself to gradually minimize the size of the visual display and see it getting minimized and then finally see it blanked out. Or you can visualize it and then crumple it and put it into a virtual dust bin/waste paper basket.

In cognitive method, recall the person who wronged you and say aloud or silently, “I have forgiven you without any grudge against you. I have also forgotten that incident and it will never haunt me again.”

So after you forgive and forget and once your emotional or mental health starts improving and you leave behind your stresses and strains, your physical health will also improve. Forgiving and forgetting will result in reducing anger, bitterness, resentment and other negative emotions and reducing the stress. It will help in strengthening the relationships. Additionally forgiving and forgetting will help maintain normal blood pressure and reducing pain (including back pain), stomach ailments and headaches.

For More Guidance, Assistance, Training and Consultation

Contact: prodcons@prodcons.com


Training in all the soft skills and various management functions/techniques is imparted by Prodcons Group’s Mr Shyam Bhatawdekar and/or Dr (Mrs) Kalpana Bhatawdekar, eminent management educationists, management consultants and trainers- par excellence, with distinction of having trained over 150,000 people from around 250 organizations.


Also refer: (Prodcons Group) http://prodcons-group.blogspot.com/, (Training Programs by Prodcons Group) http://training-development-function.blogspot.com/, (Productivity Consultants) http://productivity-consultants.blogspot.com/

Other Topics of Interest: Counseling: General and Psychological

(Anger Management) http://controlling-anger.blogspot.com/
(Children’s Behavior Problems) http://child-behavior-problems.blogspot.com/
(Cholesterol Control) http://controlling-cholesterol.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counselingfamily.blogspot.com/
(Counseling: Psychological) http://counseling-family.blogspot.com/
(Cross Cultural Etiquette) http://cross-cultural-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Do This Today) http://do-this-today.blogspot.com/
(Emotions) http://emotion-feeling.blogspot.com/
(Executive Etiquette and Manners) http://executive-manners.blogspot.com/
(Exercises) http://exercises-plan.blogspot.com/
(Family Counseling) http://family-harmony.blogspot.com/
(Health: Homeopathy) http://homeopathy-medicines.blogspot.com/
(Life Management: Competencies) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/competency-matrix/6txz9nck6g3/4#
(Life Management: Effectiveness Management: HSoftware) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/management-in-life-profession-family/6txz9nck6g3/3#
(Life management: I Am Liberated) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/i-am-liberated/6txz9nck6g3/6#view
(Marriage Counseling) http://marriage-counsel.blogspot.com/
(Ownership on Job) http://job-ownership.blogspot.com/
(Parental Responsibilities) http://parental-responsibilities.blogspot.com/
(Personality) http://human-personality.blogspot.com/
(Qualities of Spouse) http://spouse-qualities.blogspot.com/
(Quit Smoking) http://quit-smoking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Self Development) http://managing-self.blogspot.com/
(Self-confidence) http://self-confidence-improvement.blogspot.com/

(Spiritual Quotient/Intelligence) http://spiritual-quotient.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://managing-stress-strain.blogspot.com/
(Stress Management) http://management-of-stress.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://success-achievement.blogspot.com/
(Success in Life or Success) http://knol.google.com/k/shyam-bhatawdekar/success-in-life/6txz9nck6g3/14#view
(Swine Flu and Its Prevention) http://swine-flu-precaution.blogspot.com/
(Telephone Etiquette) http://telephone-etiquette.blogspot.com/
(Walking) http://walking-plan.blogspot.com/
(Winners and Losers) http://winners-losers.blogspot.com/

Stress Management: Either You Can be Right or You Can be Happy

For everything you wanted to know on building leadership and management, refer Shyam Bhatawdekar’s website: http://shyam.bhatawdekar.com/

Refer our High Quality Management Encyclopedia “Management Universe” at: http://management-universe.blogspot.com/

For free tutorials on “Train the Trainers” program, refer: http://train-trainers.blogspot.com/

Either You Can be Right or You Can be Happy: Its Less Likely that You Can be Both

One of the less thought about and talked about reason (but very important one) for feeling stressed from time to time is one's desire to be "right" or "perfect" all the time. And what is "right" is cooked up by the same person who is trying to be right. Agreed that he/she might have thought about it pretty seriously within the ambit of his own cerebral capabilities and after having read lots of literature on it or by being very observant of the people who seem to be right to him/her etc. Yet, finally, it is solely his/her own perception.

So, despite much of such research, the question is: can he/she be absolutely sure that what he defined as perfect or right was really right or perfect? No one can be too sure about it. It definitely is not sacrosanct or the ultimate truth. Yet some people pursue these mirages of being right and perfect all the time with missionary vengeance. In addition, such tribes do not want to fail or be seen as failing against the benchmarks set by them.

And see below what they try to achieve in pursuit of meeting this perfectness! They seriously practice it in most trivial things of life as well as things of medium and high importance. Here are some classic examples:

• Pronounce each and every word of each and every language correctly.
• Being dressed prim and proper every minute and every hour of all the days of an year.
• Never squeeze the tooth paste tube or shaving cream tube or moisturizer tube or for that matter any such other tube in its middle.
• Following each and every dining table manner and telephone etiquette and every other social etiquette to the letter as described in numerous etiquette and manners manuals authored by all kinds of self proclaiming experts.
• Never leave the clothes on the beds of the bedrooms or on the floors of bathrooms even for a second.
• Make sure that toilet seat is always covered without fail and flush at least twice after having done the thing in the toilet.
• Always eat the perfectly nutritious food in every meal everywhere. Never ever exceed the calorie and other specifications set out by the numerous nutrition experts.
• Always sleep on the right side of the bed and let the spouse sleep always on the left side of the bed.
• Sticking to punctuality in each and every situation.  
• Loading the washing machine or dish washer in the right way- as thought out as right by self.
• All the time trying to set out goals of all kinds and trying to meet those goals and getting upset when not meeting them.
• Pushing the son(s)/daughter(s) to become champions in many things right around their age of 5 or 6 and feeling upset when they fail to meet such expectations.
• Presenting self, spouse and children as the most mannerly creatures of the earth.  
• Never miss the deadlines in professional or any other type of jobs.

and the list can go on and on.

Trying to be reasonably effective and efficient is understandable because that can be met within your capabilities and within your other resources. But then excess of anything is bad. When you set out some crazy ideals for self and are likely to expect them from your spouse, children, parents, subordinates and colleagues,  it becomes too much for yourself and everyone else around you. And then stresses and strains develop because such tall expectations are beyond the available capabilities and resources. That leaves you and others not only stressed but it is likely to disrupt the human relations from time to time. That further adds to your and others' woes.

Many times what is right or wrong is never very clear. Different people do things differently and to each one that may be right. So, on trivial and many other issues, insistence on achieving a particular "right way" may be inviting unnecessary stresses. Yet, on some important issues of life what is realistic and achievable must definitely be discussed and what capabilities and other resources of self and others will be required to achieve them must be assessed.

The whole discussion here does not promote accepting a compromising or sloppy attitude towards life but warns all of us against being obsessed about being "right" or "perfect" (as defined by self) all the time.

Being flexible and setting realistic and achievable goals within the means of capabilities and resources is the golden path traversing on which will be least stressful and yet meaningfully fulfilling.

For More Guidance, Assistance, Training and Consultation
Contact: prodcons@prodcons.com

Training in all the soft skills and various management functions/techniques is imparted by Prodcons Group’s Mr Shyam Bhatawdekar and/or Dr (Mrs) Kalpana Bhatawdekar, eminent management educationists, management consultants and trainers- par excellence, with distinction of having trained over 150,000 people from around 250 organizations.

Also refer: (Prodcons Group) http://prodcons-group.blogspot.com/, (Training Programs by Prodcons Group) http://training-development-function.blogspot.com/, (Productivity Consultants) http://productivity-consultants.blogspot.com/